The BEST Proven Parental Feeding Style for Kids

Recently I had friends and their four year old son over for dinner. I didn’t hold back and cooked up a storm! There was an array of choices on the dinner table, including a variety of vegetables ripe for the picking!

Their son was initially intimidated by all the choice. Then his dad said, “This looks delicious! I’m going to be super strong eating all these vegies!”

To follow this up, I said, “You can choose whatever you want to eat, and how much you want - to help charge up your superhero powers.”

His dad, playing along, winked at his son, flexing his biceps. Our little superhero decided to copy what his dad was picking from the little buffet. His dad wanted some carrot? So did he! “Superhero eyesight!” I said. Dad chose a bit of pumpkin. “Also good for super vision!” BAM. The pumpkin was straight on our little superhero’s plate!

That dinner created a fun and positive experience for their son! He wanted to be just like his superhero dad! I’ve heard since that night, he’s been more willing to eat his fruit and vegetables to be just like his superhero idol!

My story is an example of the authoritative feeding style in practice (not to be confused with ‘authoritarian’ - the controlling food parenting style). The ‘authoritative’ feeding style involves listening to your children to give them independence and has been associated with positive outcomes like increased fruit and vegetable consumption, improved weight status, and higher school performance (Arlinghaus et al., 2018; Shloim et al., 2015).

My story is an example of the authoritative feeding style in practice (not to be confused with ‘authoritarian’ - the controlling food parenting style). The ‘authoritative’ feeding style involves listening to your children to give them independence and has been associated with positive outcomes like increased fruit and vegetable consumption, improved weight status, and higher school performance (Arlinghaus et al., 2018; Shloim et al., 2015).

Children desire independence and autonomy and pressuring or forcing food onto them can lead to them not eating at all (Leung et al., 2012). Repeated, neutral exposures to new fruit and vegetables can lead to acceptance over time so just be patient (Leung et al., 2012).

Setting reasonable limits to snacking has been shown to help children to manage their own intake of energy-dense snacks (Rollins et al., 2014). ‘Reasonable’ is the key word here, so don’t restrict ALL snacks but at the same time don’t provide unlimited access (Rollins et al., 2014)! You want your kids to be hungry and eat their veggies so you can’t have them filling up on snacks!

Having fruits and vegetables available and accessible in the house has been found, with encouragement, to increase consumption of those items (Blissett, 2011). These easily accessible fruits and vegetables can replace the restricted discretionary snacks, allows your hero to choose their own fruits and vegetables when they want, and can be used to show them how much you enjoy fruits and vegetables (O’Connor et al., 2010). For example, store a container or platter with a variety of chopped up fruits and veg in the fridge so your child has the choice to have a healthy snack! This way when they come home from school with an appetite, they’ll be more likely to eat fruit and vegies - they decide which ones they choose and how much.

If you haven't already, register here for our complimentary introduction to the 'Psychology of Food Parenting' Video, along with some great evidence-based strategies to empower your little one to be more willing to eat more fruits and vegetables.

And, if your little one loves superheroes, but doesn't love eating their vegies, click here to order your copy of the fantastic 'I am a Superhero: Fruit & Veg' Hardcover Book to help captivate their imagination and taste buds to help get fruit and veg on the menu!

Wishing you and your family good health and happiness.