Introducing our new blogger - Abi Gold

b.box is delighted to welcome Abi Gold, our new blogger extraordinaire and mum of 4. Her house is like a zoo, and she usually has a smear of Vegemite on her top, but her kids are happy, and most of the time, she loves being their mum. Abi is a also an expereinced Family Therapist, Counsellor and Family Mediator, and runs Juggle, a Family and Parenting Consultancy, which counsels and supports busy mums and dads. Abi knows exactly how tough it can be to juggle all the things that mums and dads do, and has some great techniques for survival! Look Abi up at www.familyjuggle.com.au

Enjoy her first blog post for b.box. We're sure you'll relate.

Murderous mornings!

I woke up this morning with a pirate ship in my armpit. A four year old was perched on my chest, using a torch to examine the inside of my nose, and someone small and noisy with cold hands, was making his way up my doona, singing “I'm not going to school today, and you can't make me!” to the tune of “Happy Birthday”.

What is it about mornings, that brings out the swamp creature in my children and the shouty monster in me? Could it be that they've been up all night snorting sherbet, or did someone spike their milk? I know exactly what makes me so grumpy in the mornings - it's a combination of caffeine withdrawal, the shock of seeing my mother in the mirror again, and yet another failed attempt to use the bathroom by myself.

And whose idea was it to invent morning television for the under 10's? I mean really! It's hard enough catching a 4 year old and prizing him out of his Spiderman outfit in time for breakfast, without the added hassle of having to lay down a path of jelly beans from the sofa, sticking the remote control down my bra, and negotiating terms for not kicking anyone on the way.

And don't get me started on the trauma of getting in the car. How many times is it reasonable to repeat the word “shoes” without the neighbours thinking you're mad, and is it normal to forget your bag every day? And your homework?

It may not be perfect, but this is the way it is in our house, and I have come to accept it. The kids have too. This is normal for us, and to a great extent, it works. By 9 o'clock, everyone's gone, and the house is silent. Funny though, I think I actually prefer the noise.